I Got Your VD Right Here!

So, I'm feeling a little like a girl today. I just finished watching Sleepless in Seattle for, believe it or not, the first time and I have to admit I got a little teary eyed at the end. Then, of course, I remembered that last Valentine's day when I was in a relationship, I spent the day getting into a huge fight with my significant other. It involved hair pulling, blowing up heart shaped balloons, profanity and the bitch taking my X-box as a hostage. I got it back unharmed, but nonetheless, the day served as a poignant reminder that this is just a corporate shrill of a holiday. VD, as I've taken to calling it, was made up by the sinister heart-shaped candy and greeting card consortium. In reality, there are no happy endings. The truth is that Tom Hanks is just a bad, negligent father that didn't even notice his kid flying across the country to meet a stranger. Call me bitter, but I call it pragmatism.

Dating and relationships can be like the good sex that cums (look mom, I made a pun) along with them-- rough and fun. If you're alone this VD day, watch a sappy movie and fall in love with the notion of being in love. Believe me, sometimes it's better than the real thing. Also, try and think back to when you were in a relationship and how badly you wanted to be single again. On the other hand, if you're with someone tonight, don't get caught up in the cupid charade and remember the statistics aren't in your favor.

Either way, take this as solace. True Romance is more than just a Tarentino film or a candlelit dinner and it does exist. Take my recently demoted best friend (you know what you did, Bitch!) who traveled 16 hours through snow capped highways in a packed car with a dog just to reunite with her man on Cupid's day. That's true love, right? I'm so jaded I can't tell anymore. --HK